Dark thoughts be gone.

Today it is dark here, rain thunders like vicious darts they pock mark the ground with dark holes.  I smile despite the weather and the watcher I spot every now and then.

Out of a dark corner close to the house, a figure rises, creeps to the window and peeps in. I catch a glance and shiver, death carriers are coming close. On the last occasion they heralded mum’s death, the time before my aunt’s.

I didn’t know then what they were about, but now I do it scares me like nothing else on this earth.

At times my thoughts on them are varied.  Sometimes when in a dark mood I think of them as creepers or creepy thieves, lusting after souls soon to depart.

In happier moments I think of them as angels who are trying to remain hidden, coming to check on how strong those close to the departing souls are doing. My theory is that they will only take a soul when all around are strong enough to withstand the terrors and aftershocks that death brings with it.

It has not been a good week, children will be children but I have a niece who believes she is always right, bright and cheery she surfs her way through life . If a problem arises she simply knocks it aside, ignores it or changes her route to avoid it. If life is going her way we see her often but when times are bad visits are sporadic. The last six were a desert, she avoids us like the plague. There was  no row, no obvious reason. Her way brings hurt to those close to her. All we can do is wait, search and pray.

A coward stole from my dad. There is no value to be put on sentiment but this low life burglar lost out, he took the few gold bits but left the memories behind (everyday cheaper jewellery that was worn often) and missed what was most precious mum’s wedding rings.

So I console myself that perhaps there is a reason why those dark shapes lurk, perhaps they are mere angels who hate the Irish weather and are checking on us, on our mental state, on our ability to cope or have they come hoping to be entertained by our moaning and groaning?

They will be waiting.