Diary entry…. 15-12-2013 (contains sexual and explicit language)

Today I found myself a little disappointed. When Justin was here yesterday I was a lot more productive using Renoise ( a drum machine like sequencer for a personal computer ), however when I was on my own I got more stuck on things to do, knobs to tweak, samples to place etc. I have been working very slowly for quite a while. On the positive side of this I have learnt an all round frequency awareness of different sounds and maybe some patience, on the negative side I have learnt a lot less awareness in frequency in quantity of different sound types and learnt a lot less practical sampling order and sequencing. I found myself writing some basic hip hop lyrics with a couple of word play types. I found my voice is still quite flat and expressionless, although it has improved a little bit. I found that if the overall voice volume on a recorded vocal is even and I normalise the sample to 0db and then boost it by 12db in the sample editor then it has a satisfactory boost. The distortion of this brings some noise to the vocal so it sounds a little harsher and brighter in the mid and higher frequencies. This (I think) is equivalent to a 20:1 compressor or limiter setting with a -12db threshold on a track with a 0db maximum volume with no attack or decay. I saw my friend Thomas Anderson at his place for a cup of tea, he fed me some french baked beans from a giant tin which had bits of duck and random sausages in it. I have never seen a tin of food so big in english stores, I had already eaten so it was a little glutinous. I conspired that it might be from a french town where they kill people for whatever reason then place the dead body’s in cheap meat products. Perhaps this is why horse meat is illegal, it may be similar to human meat in some parts, I guess years ago if you said it was similar to human meat then people may assume you were evil or something. Unless you were a surgeon and also a butcher, but I imagine this too may raise suspicion so nobody wins. So the reason was kept quiet from the lesser educated public. It could just be the posh people who don’t like riding cows or goats, I guess there not as fast or strong. Anyway I went to see my friend Kelsey after this for a cup of tea and there was a documentary on his television about Dr who, why are there so many documentary’s and programs about Dr who. If people love Dr who so much then why are they not watching Dr Who instead of watching other people have conversations about Dr Who, not exactly ideal for people with poor social skills who are Dr Who fanatics because now they will have nothing to talk about without seeming like they copied it off the people from the tv. I helped Kelsey with a tiny bit of house work. He then bought me a couple of cups of tea in the pub, we played utopian scrabble (no points) and pool. I tried to focus more on words that were more relevent to my life as opposed to ones that first came in my head, thus making utopian scrabble good for reflection and insight as well as for fairness and equality. There was a hot posh woman who came in, I was worried she may be from my nuts magazine and I had made her come in some kind of strange physical real life metaphor, which would be embarrassing and difficult to explain to anyone. She had nice eyes that is for sure. My right testicle hurts a bit, it comes and goes, my doctor said it was just one of those coming with age things. One time it was from Exmouth when I was in the pub and Michelle sneaked behind a woman I was standing behind when we were smoking and pinged her bra strap and dodged out the way, then the woman turned and punched me rather hard in the balls. It was further damaged from a non descript urinary infection I got from having anal sex with a girl and the condom came off. I didn’t realise straight away as I though I had just been fucking and wanking a lot. I got it cleared up eventually but I found it hard to resist having sex and wanking at the time. I do need to be more gentle with my penis here and there, or at least swap hands or something. Anyway I am gonna have a licorice tea, do some floor exercises, havea shower, then do some breathing exercises one being chakra breathing. Then I will gently massage my body and hug my Aiko and try to sleep (he’s gonna fucking wank after that I’m telling you ) (shut up me ). Sweet dreams