Womanhood
A teenage girl has enough strength to empower the world, tell me again how you thought a woman was defined by her bra size?
For a while now, I’ve had a thought just lurking in my head. It is just there voicing itself in my mind over and over again. It is a thought about being a woman. It is about bad experiences that led to a change of heart. It is a promise and it is a dedication.
Growing up I was taught, or rather made to understand a few things about my gender:
We are expected to stretch our arms towards nothingness and gladly accept whatever it is that life places on our bare arms. Be it the darkest hour or the brightest minute. Accept it, and move the heck on. I was made to understand that the respect that is bestowed upon a woman is directly related to her clothing – less of it means less respect. I was made to understand that the moment a woman is molested or raped, BAM! she no longer has any respect in society. I was made to understand that women are here just to fulfill the gap of pleasing. Please her husband, please her mother-in-law, please society. Score! She’s succeeded at being a woman. And lastly, I was made to understand that no matter what a woman faces, it is definitely at her own accord.
These perceptions left me at a state of utter resentment toward my own gender. I found myself labelling girls, deeming them stupid for certain decisions and feeling inferior. I spent days wishing to be a man, wishing to be the ‘greater’ gender.
I have bared witness to so many accounts of verbal abuse to women, I have stood there watching the woman silently endure every foul word she is called. Why? Because I am too afraid to speak up. Because the abuser has the upper-hand, is the higher power. I have experienced gawks, shoves and pats along the streets, malls and public transport of Dubai. And very rarely have I had the courage to raise my voice. Why? Because most times, I believed it was my fault. I have listened to the encounters of a young girl that has had a male thrice her age make her feel uncomfortable. And the most I could do was apologize to this young girl. Why? Because it was a dark night and my courage failed me yet again. The amount of times a prostitute has been sworn at and disrespected in front of me is innumerable, and yet I have remained put.
These are a mere few experiences I have faced as a woman. And nothing angers me more than my failing courage. Nothing saddens me more than my helplessness to such situations. A year ago, an incident in Delhi stirred my emotions and led me to think about my own personal experiences and witnesses as a woman. I was sickened by the opposite sex, and remain so to this day.
My anger and my sadness left me anew.
Although my anger and sadness will diminish the day I witness a woman being treated as a human being, my perception on women has altered completely, and I am so glad and proud to call myself a woman.
I send my love, my honour and my prayer to all the women out there that have been or are victim to misogyny. And I promise, to try my best to defeat my fear, if and when I witness or experience any misogynistic behaviour.
I dedicate this blog post to all the women in my life – my mother, my aunts, my sisters, my friends, my teachers.
To the survivors, the endurers, and the courageous.
You are my strength.
see you in a few years x
good one Thanks
:0)
Sorry you were raised to be such a non important being. God has directed me down a path of righteousness that I would try to be the best I can be with chronic illnesses. when I say directing me down that path, I don’t mean it to say “to be perfect”. I mean it to say I will keep Him close at Hand so He can direct me down the right path and He won’t be so disappointed in me. God loves us regardless of the mistakes we make in this world. He even loves those men and loose women who let you down in this world of sin. Remember, those women would not be in those positions unless forced into it. Nobody enjoys being demeaned. I am so pleased for you that you can see the positive here. Remain strong in His love and turn to Him each time you feel a sense of loss or defeat. He will carry you in His almighty arms.
I no longer deem those women stupid. I guess it was just a matter of perspective. I just wish men did not treat women the way they do. It is not fair. I am not sure if my post made me sound like I am against women? I am not. Thank you for your kind words.
We all have our different paths to walk from all over the world. I am in the United States and feel privileged to live my entire life without brutal condemnation from males figures. I have been hurt by many, but finally found a really good one who gives me the respect everyone should give one another. You are young. I am proud of you for the growth that has taken place in your life. Something that may make you feel really good is to help out a woman in need, one of those disreputable women. God Bless………….
I totally understand what you mean. Your words of encouragement mean so much to me. Thank you so much. And I am happy that you found happiness. It makes me glad 😀 thank you once again! 🙂 and yes, it is He who will guide us.
Let’s be friends. Do you live in Dubai? In an apartment? Do you have family nearby? Doesn’t Dubai have a lot of wealthy citizens living there? What do you do for a living. I would enjoy becoming friends with another woman of God from a whole different world.
Did I scare you off? Perhaps I was a bit assertive in my request to become friends. I have another friend from a Eurasian country who has been attending college in London for a few years and I think she ended up there working now. She wanted to work in her home country but last time we spoke she was in London. Anyway, sorry if I scared you off. Perhaps you just had to run off. Sincerely, Brenda
No, no you did not! I was just caught up with some work. Hah! I grew up in Dubai but live in England right now. It’s nice here 🙂 Dubai had a a very different environment, yes there’s many wealthy people there, but that’s just the surface of Dubai. It is much different otherwise. My parents live in Dubai but my family live here and Kenya. 😀 you did not scare me off 🙂
What life in America like? I’ve always wondered!
Life in America is a good life. We have many freedoms that many countries throughout the world do not have. Women are treated better here and have many more rights than in other countries. If we lose our job or are too sick or injured to work, the government helps us out all the time. I am sixty years old and have four children from ages 30-40 years. I am married and have two doggies named Benji and Toby. I live in north United States where we get lots of snow in the winters. We just got our first snow two days ago. We have wonderful times of the year coming up with a Thanksgiving celebration (lots of food and celebration) and one month later we celebrate the birth of Jesus who is God’s Son who was sent to live on earth to teach us about His Father, God. People give gifts to each other and sing lots of music, celebrate with lots of food again, that is December 25. Then, one week later is the New Year celebration when the next calendar year begins.
It sounds so wonderful! I am quite familiar with Thanksgiving seeing as I am in love with the TV show Friends 😀 and Christmas too is popular over here in the UK! 🙂
Hi,
I don’t remember if you gave me your name or not. Yes, our Thanksgiving and Christmas winter celebrations are wonderful. It gets people into a thankful time in their lives for all we have on earth. I firmly believe in Jesus Christ, so I am a strong Christian. In my sickness several years ago I was taking sleeping pills and many other ones that made me loopy so I stopped them and didn’t sleep for three days. I cried out asking Jesus to give me sleep. I slept that night and have every night since about four years ago. Jesus gave me a miracle to show me He is with me at all times and that He can do anything. I am very blessed. Hope you are too. Sending big hugs to you dear new friend. I hope our friendship can last a long time. Brenda
Hi Brenda! I am Meera
I study in the UK, I am 20 and hoping to pursue a degree in journalism 😊 Yes, I have lots of family here and in Kenya. My family in Kenya is safe, thank you 😊
I am a Hindu girl and we have many religious festivals too. I only started reading about my religion a year or so ago, and it has helped me greatly. So I understand what you mean, when you speak about religion. One of my best friends from high school is a Christian, and she taught me the importance of praying. So did my mum. 😊
I think its really nice that you’ve written a book! That has been my life long dream as well. Well it was, I sort of just gave up on it 😞 I do try and write though, my wordpress is areemeers.wordpress.com if you would like to check it out 😊
We don’t celebrate thanksgiving here in the UK, I am just familiar with the concept because I grew up watching American TV shows 😃 hah!
This is a wonderful post. Everybody needs to read this.
Thank you so much 😀
You’re welcome
I don’t remember your name or maybe we didn’t exchange that. I am Brenda. I did tell you that earlier. I am sorry I haven’t responded sooner. I’ve just been busy. I had a book signing last weekend which took me away from home for a day. I wrote a book and am signing it at different stores who are selling it for me.
Our snow is gone but we will get more soon I think. I didn’t think that Thanksgiving and Christmas are in the U.K. also. Too many people act like it is all about Santa Claus which is shameful because it is so very much about the birth of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. I have very strong beliefs about Jesus and hope others throughout the world can come to find Him as their savior also. What are you doing in the U.K. now? Do you have many family members in U.K. and Kenya? Is your family in Kenya safe? My sister adopted a girl from Kenya about four years ago. I don’t know where in Kenya she was from though.
I will wait for another note from you. Your name?
Brenda Brown Elliott
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